Take it Down a Notch

Introducing my husband's "cancer husband"

I've heard my friends joke about having a "work husband" or a "work wife" - the person at the office they are closest to that isn't, of course, their real partner. I also have friends with "tennis husbands," with whom they play mixed doubles tennis with on a regular basis (if their spouse doesn't play or isn't available). Well, I want to introduce you to my husband's "cancer husband" - Mark Scholz, MD.

When Steve was first going through diagnosis (and it is a process), he spent many hours locked up in his office alone with Dr. Scholz and the Prostate Cancer Research Institute team. There was a period of time there where I'm pretty sure my husband was happier to see Dr. Scholz's bearded face than he was to see mine (especially since my face was looking pretty worried at the time, and by contrast, Dr. Scholz seems to have what I can only call Resting Kind Face).

Seeing Dr. Scholz's face meant a new video, and a new video from Dr. Scholz meant more information and help. And one of the most important videos we watched early on in the process was this one:

If you're at the beginning of your prostate cancer journey the most important thing anyone can say to you is, to quote Dr. Scholz, "Take it down a notch."

Many men rush into treatment decisions before the word "cancer" even leaves their doctors' lips. Some of these treatments can drastically affect your quality of life. Even worse, some of these drastic treatments may be unnecessary. And unlike many other cancers, prostate cancer is generally slow-growing—which can allow patients time to research and make informed treatment decisions. According to Dr. Scholz, even in cases of men with a Gleason 9 score, where the risk of spread is higher, allowing a few months for research and consultations is unlikely to significantly impact outcomes.

I'll stress again that my husband and I are not doctors. We are not done with our journey, either. He's had HDR brachytherapy and SBRT to remove the cancer from his prostate and lymph nodes, as well as Androgen Deprivation therapy. All the lab results are looking good and we seem to have survived with most of the things we care about intact! However, we can't advise anyone to do what we did. We just want to use this newsletter to recommend that you learn all you can from multiple sources, then partner with your medical team and advocate for the treatment plan that is best for you.

Dr. Scholz urges that, even with a Gleason 10, postponing treatment for a few months to gain a thorough understanding of the situation is preferable.

“Serious mistakes are much more likely to hurt you than a delay of treatment for two to three months.” - Dr. Scholz

The risk of a negative impact from a short delay is minimal, around 1%, he says in the video.

So if you’re facing a prostate cancer diagnosis, the best thing you can do is take some time and learn as much as you can before deciding on a treatment path. Get a full understanding of your personal circumstances and research the best path forward based on your unique situation.

Have a great rest of your day!

Brenna & Steve